Ten Tips for Showing an Occupied Home
As a real estate agent, I’ve become pretty accustomed to wandering around in people’s occupied homes. It’s just the nature of the business. People have a hard time buying a house without first selling a house because most people’s incomes can’t support two mortgages. Because of that, people place their occupied homes on the market while they are in search of their new home.
As a buyer, though, it’s not something you’re going to feel very comfortable with at first. Unless you come from a sordid background and have ample experience with breaking and entering, of course. But I don’t think that’s ever really the case. And if it is, I have never had a buyer forthcoming enough for them to tell me so. But anyway, people are not naturally comfortable with walking around in someone’s home while they are not there, as it goes against every imaginable social norm.
I was reminded of this when I brought my two oldest children with me on a showing. I was showing the house to my mom, so this was a rare occasion where my children’s presence was specifically requested.
Since I have been in real estate for most of my daughter’s life, I thought that they had a pretty firm understanding of the nature of my job. I’ve told them many times when asked, “What do I do for work?” that, “I sell houses.” So I assumed they knew what we were doing walking through these homes with my mom (sometimes occupied, sometimes not).
Every time we walked into an occupied home, I’d have the talk with them, “Okay, now remember, this isn’t our house. These aren’t our things. Stay close to me. Don’t touch anything.” yadda, yadda, yadda.
But for some reason, this one day, in this one house, my daughter (after months of viewing homes, mind you) says, “Can we not be in people’s houses we’re not supposed to be in anymore?”
I was kind of shocked, but I mostly thought it was just hilarious that she was thinking that she had just been complicit in a string of nonviolent breaking and enterings over the past several months and that her dad was just this nice, deluded man who enjoyed the thrill of walking his mom through other people’s homes.
Now, hopefully, you know that I have access to these homes through the Multiple Listing Service and my affiliation as a REALTOR®. I also schedule all of these showings through the listing agent and have the full permission of the seller to be in the property. But for those of you who are not aware of some of the etiquette involved in such a strange and personal process, hopefully, this article can be of some assistance to you.
1. Be wary of cameras/recording devices.
We live in a digital age. The thought of someone having a recording device in their house used to seem a bit farfetched or outlandish. But with how readily available and affordable technology is these days, it’s not unreasonable to assume that you are being watched and listened to wherever you go. So I think a safe rule of thumb would be to assume you’re being watched and listened to, wherever you go.
This means that any feedback, positive or negative, should be reserved for when we are no longer on the property.
You might be wondering why I say that positive feedback should be withheld. It’s obvious that we don’t want to say anything harsh enough about a seller’s home or decorations for us to offend them, especially if we end up putting an offer in. If you’ve spoken poorly of their home or decor, and now you want to move forward with an offer, you’re already on the wrong foot.
But the reason I say to keep all feedback to yourself, positive or negative, is because of the leverage you might accidentally give away before you ever even make it to negotiations. If you’re in their house and you can’t get over how perfect it is, and you’re saying all of this aloud, and the sellers hear you, they won’t expect anything less than full price. And when they counter, they already know how much you love the house, so they now have all the leverage.
So, instead of “if you don’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all.” Just “say nothing at all.” And no, I’m not saying it should be like a funeral procession at every showing. Just don’t give too much away. Keep your comments neutral or conversational. If they see you walking through the house and on the inside, you’re ABSOLUTELY IN LOVE WITH THE HOUSE, but on the outside, you’re cool, calm, and collected; the seller is going to be like, “Wow, I can not get a read on this person. They are stone-cold. I better lower my list price so I don’t lose them.”
Obviously, that’s a severe dramatization. But you get the point.
2. Leave a card.
This is not to solicit your services as a real estate agent. This is a courtesy to the home seller to provide them with the information of who exactly was in their home.
3. Leave it as you found it.
Let common sense prevail. If they had all the lights off but all the lamps on, leave with all the lights off and all the lamps on. If they didn’t have a garage door locked, leave the garage door unlocked. But if you’re ever unsure of how they’d like it left, you can review the showing instructions on the MLS sheet. And if you’re still unsure, the listing agent is a phone call away. I can tell you from experience that I’ve never been anything but thankful when a buying agent calls me to ensure they leave the property as the sellers wish.
4. Don’t look through drawers (obviously).
When buying a house, you’re most likely not buying all of the furniture in the house. Unless specifically negotiated. Therefore, there is not much reason to be peeking through people’s dresser drawers. It’s not so cut and dry when it comes to whether you should be looking into the drawers in the bathroom or kitchen cabinets, as those are both things that will remain with the property. But unless it’s a specifically marketed special drawer (like a Lazy Susan, corner drawer, cutting board drawer, etc.), we all have a pretty good idea of the depth and width of drawers.
5. Don’t use the restrooms (1 or 2).
Before you get started with the, “But what if it’s an emergency? Should I just go in my pants?” Obviously, there are exceptions to nearly every rule. Rules were meant to be bent, right? Or at least that’s what rule-breakers say to justify their tomfoolery.
This is just a rule of thumb. Another thing to keep in mind is that all of these “Tips” could probably vary ten different ways between ten different agents. There is more than one way to cook a chicken. I know that. But the safest advice I can give to anyone who will be in someone’s home while they are not there is to leave as little evidence of your presence in that home as possible.
It’s an uncomfortable feeling opening your home to the general public for a bunch of real estate agents you might or might not know who walk through your house with buyers you might or might not know. As a courtesy to the seller, get in, see what you need to see, and get out as soon as possible. And remember, you get a chance to inspect the home (toilets included) before you purchase it.
6. If kids are present, keep them in sight (and in check).
As a person with several kids, I understand very well how difficult it can be to get them to act calmly in an environment they are not accustomed to, or around people they are not familiar with. It’s hard enough to achieve any order when we are all at home. I also understand how difficult it is to find a babysitter, especially on short notice! Which is the type of notice you often have when you find the right house for you in a hot market and don’t want to wait a second and risk losing it to another buyer.
I’m not one of those people who will judge a parent whose kids are screaming or acting crazy in public. Kids are crazy. Period. That’s why I always make it a point to be sure that we all, as a team, coach the kids on what’s appropriate and what’s inappropriate while viewing an occupied home. Most of my buyers who are parents do a great job of this on their own, though, thankfully. But this is just another thing, as a courtesy to the seller, that I always try and be mindful of.
7. Be mindful of inside pets needing to remain inside pets or outside pets needing to remain outside pets.
Pets, or fur babies, or whatever you decide to call them, are usually held very near and dear to a person’s heart. They are often referred to as children by fanatic animal lovers. So, it’s no surprise that most people have crafted their home life around the well-being of their animals. They might be an inside pet who would run away forever if let out of the house or an outside animal who would chew holes through drywall if they were let inside the house.
Your job as a real estate agent, while showing someone’s occupied (or vacant) home, is to maintain the status quo. This means that you should pay close attention to how everything was when you arrived at the property. Ideally, the sellers will figure out how to keep their animals from interfering with buyers or agents while their home is being shown (i.e., put them in a crate for showings). But we don’t live in an ideal world, as 2020 has viciously reminded us. Some sellers work a long way from home and cannot make last-minute accommodations for showings, so they will instead provide instructions for any agent showing the property. Just follow the instructions and make sure you don’t place yourself in no man’s land, between a person and their pet.
8. Remember that taste in interior decorating is not universal.
I’ve seen a lot of stuff over my career as a real estate agent: shag carpets, textured paneling and trim, painted windows, fake body parts in jars (for real), carpeted bathrooms, and the list goes on. But something I’ve learned is that my opinions do not always align with my clients’. I’ve been walking through a house, internally roasting the decor or color or texture choices, fully expecting my clients to echo my thoughts aloud, only to be met with glowing reviews of the house.
Another reason to keep this in mind, though, harkens back to the first tip: the potential existence of recording devices in the house. I can tell you with no uncertainty that many sellers are parked just around the block or at a neighbor’s house, watching and listening to the showing on their phone. So if you are in there making fun of their home, they will not be too happy. And seeing as decor is not enough (usually) to deter a buyer from making an offer on the house, an angry or offended seller is not the ideal way to kick off negotiations. Not to mention that it never feels good to hurt someone’s feelings.
9. Just pretend like the sellers are there with us.
Have you ever gone to a dinner party at a friend’s house and had them take you on a tour of their home? If you said yes, I bet you were largely complimentary of everything on the tour. Most people aren’t going to walk around a person’s home making fun of their aesthetic directly to their face. The best rule of thumb is to behave the same way in the homeowner’s absence.
10. Check shoes and remove them if needed.
Not everyone is going to have the same standards for cleanliness. I’ve been in every level of cleanliness or filth imaginable, from ballasts passing white glove inspections with flying colors to hoarder houses with more cats than electrical outlets. So it’s pretty safe to say that not everyone will expect you to take off your shoes or put on booties to enter the home. But it’s also safe to say that, with the proper amount of observation and awareness, you can get a pretty good feel for someone’s comfort level regarding cleanliness almost as soon as you pull up to the house.
Pride of ownership is an evident and beautiful thing. These are the houses that don’t sit on the market for long, as they’re the houses that people love to look at. So if you pull up to the house and the lawn looks like a putting green, the landscaping is immaculate, there’s not a piece of concrete that’s ever seen a blade of grass, and the front porch is swept multiple times per day, assume that the inside of the house will be no exception. Just use your best judgment, make your assessment based on that, and adjust your behavior to fit the house’s aesthetic.
Most of this boils down to making sure you treat others and their homes with respect. You might not expect people to take their shoes off in your home, but remember that everyone is different. What bothers you might not bother others, and vice versa.
